Reflections Alone

(17th January 2009)
 
I am cold here.

I sit here alone with my Habit,
Sit and think of you,
My only love.

Where are you tonight?
Do you wait? Do you hunger for me now?
Are we to be together this night?
Or is it another illusion of the moonlight?
Another dream, a fantasy of our love.

I need you here.
All I have is my habits and pets,
They do not replace or demand you,
Do not tell me of you and of me,
Only to reflect in me your shadow,
And a reflection of your love.

Where are you tonight?
If I go up, are you there in my bed?
Awaiting me, waiting to hold and hug,
And do all that lovers do?

Or are you far away?

It is so cold here.
Without you my night blows a thousand kisses away,
I see them on the wind, in the clouds like raindrops,
They call to me, they need me, want me to come,
But I am outside them.

How to approach? to get closer?
Ohh how I need them now close to me!
They are like you - a comfort to my bosom,
A reminder of what I have not,
But what I could have if try I will.
Why must it be this way?

Exhaust me do my thoughts,

My reasoning is hollow, my truth a lie,
To get there I must tread another path,
One of uncertainty and sorrow.
Will YOU be there at Journey's End??
I Fear not,
And yet .....

I dream it WILL be so!